went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Best friends brother. Beat that.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize