Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
