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Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
