Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
