A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
