so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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