dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
