I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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