yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You don't make any sense
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