New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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