I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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