I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
You ruined the universe
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
