Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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