took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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