are you still at the devil's house?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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