Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
