He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
