GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
