If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
