I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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