Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
