I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize