i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I want to be your penis for a week.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
