Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
