They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
