He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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