Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
