Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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