So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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