hell yes lets make some ravioli
what day is it and did you see me today?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
