hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
