**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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