96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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