Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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