im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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