I'm jealous of your bromance
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
