I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize