Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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