Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
