I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
