so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
