After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize