My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We were destined to go to rehab together
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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