So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Reggie can tackle my bush.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
