I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
