If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
