You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
