you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
