i just had sex bonerless
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
