I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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