i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
